Today I read a book called "Never Let it End" by Ruth Bell Graham. It's a compilation of her reflections on life, love and marriage. She wrote so many poems to release her emotions throughout her life. One of the poems I read was especially beautiful and meaningful. She expresses her take on love and what it's made of. So I am going to include it.
You look at me
and see
my flaws;
I look at you
and see flaws, too.
Those who love,
know love
deserves
a second glance;
each failure serves
another chance.
Love looks to see,
beyond the scars
and flaws
the cause;
and scars become
an honorable badge
of battles fought
and won -
(or lost) but fought!
The product,
not the cost,
is what love sought.
***
God help us see
beyond the now
to the before,
and note with tenderness
what lies between
- and love the more!
I guess I just find that poem to be so beautiful! Ruth Graham has such a unique way with her words. She communicates with so much meaning attached to her words.
From a very early age I have been so intrigued by the idea of marriage. I would analyze my parents' relationship, and try to detect their feelings from day to day. I would observe their conversations, and I could easily sense when there was tension. I was curious for many reasons, but mainly because I couldn't fathom the idea of two strangers randomly meeting, falling in love, getting married, and from there on in, sharing everything. The whole concept is bizarre. When you're a kid, you are naturally inclined to selfish behavior. Sharing gets placed in the same category as eating vegetables. It's out of the question. I always wondered if Grandma Walker REALLY liked mom or not. They seemed to get along quite well, but there were times I just wasn't certain. Same goes for my mom's parents towards dad. Maybe I was just overanalyzing situations. I have always been good at that. Anyway, my parents are still happily married, and after all these years of me being a faithful observer, you would think I would know the ropes. K, well I totally don't! I'm still baffled by the idea of exchanging vows because you are pretty sure you love this former stranger, but you don't FULLY know because you haven't spent a lifetime with them, learning something new each day. I'm not trying to be a negative nancy here, but it seems to me it's a huge risk involving plenty of work. And yet, my parents still make marriage look like it's a piece of cake. I suppose it all depends on so many countless factors, such as attitude, cooperation, perspective, willingness, faithfulness, determination, and the overall common goal. There needs to be an understanding of what is to be accomplished between a husband and a wife. I think that makes the risk worth taking. When there's a will, there is a way to accomplish. To fight through, knowing and remembering why you chose each other in the first place. So, I think marriage can stir fear in some, excitement in others, but either way it has the potential to paint an incredible picture of Christ's love.
Friday, March 28, 2008
A Good Cause
Posted by Gluten-free at 2:38 PM
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5 comments:
you know, even when you're an adult you're inclined to selfish behaviour. from what i see, that has to change in marriage - such a partnership is not about what "i" want, but what is best for the collective "us" (or sometimes just "you"). in general, that's kinda like having a best friend - don't you always want that friend to be happy? even children know this. it becomes so much more so if you have a lifelong best friend. you vow, you promise to put "us" before "i", for everything and for the rest of your life. scary? doesn't it feel good not to be the center of your own world? : )
b/
"I'm still baffled by the idea of exchanging vows because you are pretty sure you love this former stranger, but you don't FULLY know because you haven't spent a lifetime with them" - very well articulated, buddy. (Love, Den).
but even if you spent a lifetime with them, would you definitely know them? why then are people surprised when their husband/wife cheats? you can't fully know another person - it's a risk.. a leap of faith in another person that (hopefully) by all signs point to mutual loyalty and "love" (whatever *that* is, but that's another topic, no?).
some things just require faith.
b/
p.s. so much of this also reflects our relationship with Christ, but i don't know if we want to take it there.. : P
You hit on something that a few years ago changed my view of marriage right at the end of your post by saying "but either way it has the potential to paint an incredible picture of Christ's love." To me marriage is the closest earthly representation of the Trinity of God. The intimacy shared between God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Truly 3 in 1. Each seperate and serving a different role, but each complimenting the others and striving for the same goal. That's what I think marriage should be. Two individuals becoming one to compromise with and compliment each other as you would say "to paint an incredible picture of Christ's love."
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